Our client Alliant, besides rhyming in an uncanny way, is on the hunt for a Divisional Marketing Director in their Seattle office. 8-10 years of experience suggested; awesome personality required. We should mention that Alliant is one of the largest insurance brokerage firms in the nation. We should also re-mention that the position is located in Seattle, magical land of flying fish markets and misshapen trolls. If we didn’t already have jobs, we’d be there in a heartbeat.

Whew! What a crazy wild whirlwind these last two weeks were. Jonny had an audition for Glee, a photo shoot in Bali, and dinner at Zooey Deschanel’s house. Our intern’s newfound popularity has got him so booked, we may need to hire another intern to do the stuff Lil’ Jonny used to do.

Now that life at Mortar has returned to some level of sanity, we finally have time to blog about how supremely successful the Save Jonny campaign was. We reached 500 followers in 6 days – 18 days before our target date. That’s like getting an A+ when you were sure you were headed for a D. And the numbers are still growing.

The press loved Jonny, proving we’re not the only ones who want to pinch those cheeks.

And it turns out that’s not all the press loves about us. Business Insider just named Mortar’s website one of the 13 most unforgettable sites in the industry.

Aww, shucks. You shouldn’t have. But we’re glad you did.

We’re always conversing about the Conversation here at Mortar – whether it’s TIME making our brilliant clients sound appropriately brilliant, or an anchorman pantsing a brand’s strategy in the high school hallway. So naturally, it struck our fancy when Ashley Judd decided to get all up in it.

The media’s rampant disparaging of female celebrities generally renders them helpless as a field mouse caught in a boa constrictor’s death grip. Though Judd says she typically turns the other cheek to what the world says about her – she doesn’t read any of her interviews with news outlets – her friends alerted her that this time they’d gone too far. So-called legitimate publications were attributing Judd’s recent puffy face to plastic surgery, instead of to steroid medication she needed to fight a month-long sickness.

It sucks, but you can’t control the conversation about yourself. What you can do is deliver an intelligent, pointed response that upholds your integrity, and exposes your attackers’ douchebaggery.

Judd opted for the latter, and pulled it off with surprising grace. Her rebuff is critical, yet respectful, and definitely worth a read – even if just to soak in Judd’s cunningly elegant phrasing and deft vernacular. (Ashley, if you’re ever looking for a new gig, we’d love to have you. Operators are standing by.)

Talk amongst yourselves.